If you are seeking a picture of the ever-elusive Val, you need go no further than the next edition of Merriam-Webster. I'm sure my photo will be under the definition of altruist.
I stopped to put gas in my Tahoe this afternoon. A tad less than half a tank, just to top it off for the trip to take Genius to have his wisdom teeth removed on Thursday. The total came to $39.40. I went inside to pay. I don't trust those scammable card-sliders on the pumps. The clerk greeted me cheerfully. Probably because it's not a gas station that I frequent. She didn't know any better.
"That'll be thirty-four ninety, Hon."
"Uh...I'm pretty sure it was thirty-nine forty."
"Oh. Well. That's right. Thirty-nine forty. Here's your sixty cents."
"Thank you."
"You have a nice day."
"You, too."
See that? I saved the poor girl from eating $4.50 when her register didn't balance. Because I was honest. That's how I roll. Sometimes. When people are polite.
You might also look for my photo under conspiracy theorist, megalomaniac, Rubenesque, boorish, short-temper cook, gas-station-chicken-eater, Seinfeld enthusiast, procrastinator, braggart, snooze-inducer, quipster doofus, recliner whiner, and nerd.
My face, it seems, is a coat of many colors, wearing a lot of hats.
10 comments:
Where can you actually pump without prepaying? Most of the rest of us are just as honest, but we don't have opportunity to show it.
And in the dictionary, you'll find my photo to illustrate the following terms:
* Croc-wearer
* Bolthouse Farms Vanilla Chai Tea lover
* QT Bathroom Afficianado
* Guiness World Book Record Snorer
Going to my dictionary right now to see one of those fourteen faces. I think the first one I'll check out is-------gas-station-chicken-eater.
Good karma to you for correcting that bungle.
I love women that are Rubensesque.
Being a woman of much substance myself, I appreciate your honesty and I wonder if her employer is aware of her dyslexia?
Horray for you! Honesty really is the best policy.
Joanne,
We're talking about Backroads, here. Rural Missouri. I'm surprised we don't have to bring along a hank of garden hose and siphon it from a galvanized cattle tank. Most gas stations here have at least two pay-inside pumps on the lot.
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Leenie,
I am known far and WIDE for my ingestion of gas station chicken.
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Stephen,
I credit the gas station chicken for my alluring figure.
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Kathy,
I don't know about the employer, but the gal acted like it wasn't her first number-transposing rodeo.
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Donna,
Yes, and Even Steven will smack you with a karma stick if you stray from the honesty path.
Yay Val! I saved a poor girl today too. I won $27 in lottery ticket scratch off birthday gifts. The girl gave me a twenty. I said, "It's twenty seven, so give me two, one dollar scratchers and make it $25." She handed me two tickets and 26 dollars more. I said, "You said, $27, and I bought $2 so that means I only get $25." She said, "Yeah, I made a mistake. It was $26." ??? I handed her back the twenty and she gave me a one. I said, "Hon, (I hate when people call me that) I don't htink your register is going to balance, so take this dollar back. I hate math, but geesh, I could figure that much out.
Linda,
Another good deed completed from Karma's Job Jar. You really saved her a bundle! It must be that new math. Because when I am waited on by Methuselah's great-great-grandmas, they can count back change like nobody's business!
Sioux,
And apparently, your picture is also the leading entry for Val's Blog Master 5pammer. Because I just now rescued you from 5PAM limbo, where you have been languishing since June 6. A day that shall live in infamy, I might add.
I'm hoping the QT bathroom love is simply for their primo hair-washing sinks. But the Chai Tea hints that it is not.
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